THE BLESSER

So I'm feeling kind of blue. This day started out really well, and now it just sucks. Judging from the blog posted before this, one could see that I started out the day in a transcendent mood. I was hyper and wrote a book about the last week of my life. Not going to the play was a good decision on my part. Instead we went to Jesse's, Lee's Tavern, and back to Jesse's. Not gunna lie - it was a good day. Jesse introduced the amazing show 'The League of Super Evil' and I swear it may be one of the funniest cartoons I've ever seen - which is saying a lot considering how shitty the cartoons these days are. On that note, I wish some things just didn't change. I wish that the shows that were originally on Nick and Cartoon Network and the Disney Channel were still on. Honestly, it's no wonder all I wanted to do all the time was watch TV - those were some muthafuckin' great shows. After a long day of my top favorite shows, I'd get to turn on the Disney Channel at 1AM and watch The Mickey Mouse Club and Bug Juice. I loved it. Whatever. Right, The League of Super Evil - top notch show. Watch it.
Today was so nice. Honestly... I want it to be exactly how it was today - everyday. It was like the perfect temperature. I got to wear a skirt and a tank top all day and was not cold once. I love the summer. I never want it to end. Can't it just be possible to not go to college and just live in a summer atmosphere type world forever? No. I know this. But someone can dream. I don't know, I'm excited for college I guess. I just want to get away from teachers who are going to "treat us like college students" but then act like my second grade teacher when I don't hand in an assignment. Honestly, I know I'm not going to learn to be responsible with these teachers. Actually attending college is going to teach me that. I actually just realized that I've unconsciously been infected with senioritis. I've been doing less and less work these past few weeks. I just can't take this school seriously. I'm excited to go to college though. I want to experience not having to wake up at the same time - everyday. Seeing the same people - everyday. Having the same classes - everyday. It's time for a change. The only thing that troubles me is the people. I am far from sociable and even if I was - I have no desire to meet anyone knew. I really don't think that it's healthy how much I don't want to know new people. I think I need to see a therapist. Talking to people about everything there is to say does not help. I need someone who can analyze what I'm saying. Someone to figure out WHAT THE FUCK is wrong with me because I don't know and hoping people learn to deal with me is not cutting it.
I'm so tired and yet I have so much to do. My mom claims I have one of her shirts when I know for a fact I don't. So to make her happy I tore my room apart to prove this to her. Now is the time I have to clean it up. After being forced to come home. Unbelievable. I never win. It's so hard trying to prove a point with an arrogant mother who has full control over me.
Now John's at a party. Which, I say - good for him. I just don't think it's fair that if in the same situation I'd get shit for it. He's going to a party where there will be alcohol and lot's of people because I had to come home and I have no problem with it. I went to Samm's house because he couldn't hang out where there was an extremely small amount of people and there was no alcohol. To him, that is the same situation... Really? If I could get a second opinion I would. It could be just me that sees it as a completely different situation. But whatever. The party is not my problem. The way he sees situations is. The fact that that is NOT the same situation bothers me. The fact that the metaphor of him going to a big alcoholic party being the same as me going to a friends house for an hour with a small group of people, bothers me.
Whatever. I'm too tired to keep ranting about this. He's never going to see anything from my point so there's really no point. That was the gist of what I wanted to say anyway.
I'm going to clean off my bed and lay down. Goodnight.